I AM NOT A CLONE! (Kara's journal....continuous updates)

[Supergirly]

((Ok I am writing a little journal for Kara and all of her adventures, miss-adventures and people she meets. It will have lots of RP elements and some from just adventures she has. Everyone that she meets could end up in here, so it might be fun to check back every once in a while to see what she is thinking about her last encounter with you...hehe.))
Feel free to comment when you like, but keep in mind that this is going to be a long journal and will be updated often.))


I AM NOT A CLONE!
Or so I tell myself. The fact is after talking to Kyrss about it I wonder. She said that there are millions of universes out there and that even though mine was destroyed there are more realities with more Supergirls' in them. Does that make a clone? My life is similar to the current Earth's life, but we have differences too. She is older than me and more um...womanly, but does that make me a clone of her or her a clone of me? I will have to ask Kyrss about that later.

What can I say about my life here, after my own life was ended? Ok that totally sounded weird but I mean come on? I saw Mary die in front of my eyes. I saw the Watch Tower disappear and I remember Kal-El yelling at me and reaching for me before I woke up naked in that awful Brainiac ship. So did I die? Gah...ok enough pondering that on to happier subjects...Justice Girls!

I have been with the Justice Girls a few weeks now and I must say I really feel like I am home when I am talking to them. Kyrss has taken me as her sister and recently, we are more attached then even a sister could be. She lost her body and ended up missing the feeling of well...feeling anything. so I offered my DNA and WHAMO PRESTO, she is now my clone with a twist. To make sure that she didn't end up like that Bizzaro creature they added a sprinkle of plant DNA. She explained it to me once. It is like as a Kryptonian my cells can hold sunlight energy, much like photosynthesis of a plant. Well you get where I am going with that one. Anyways, she is now part plant and part me, with really pretty hair...oh its longer than mine too!

Then there is Tara Shadow. She is a Bastet I think she calls herself, a kitty cat race, although never call her that to her face. She is a proud defender that goes way back to like Egypt I think. Anyways, she kind of adopted me, when my cousin can't take care of me. After all, he is Superman...duh. So his duties keep him away from me and his other cousin, also Kara. So we have to fend for ourselves or find people that will explain things to us. Oh, one diff....Tara will tell me anything, without the "dancing around the topics" that that others do around me. "Dancing around the topics" sigh....so many sayings in English. How do you dance around something you can't even see? How do they ever communicate on Earth? They obviously have a lot of those, "not from Kansas, moments." That reminds me, since I melted my DVD player in a freak accident, ( hey it's not like I asked to be scared of that movie...it just happened and I kind of reacted.) I still need to watch that Oz Wizards of Kansas movie sometime. Maybe Star can help me later?

My roomie is Silver Star, but really she is Linda's roomie...shhhh its my secrret ID. If you are reading this...it's a secret! Anyways, she and I met each other just before I met the Justice Girls. She has a power that she got from exobytes, like so many humans do, but she can turn to metal. Ok technically she is metal and can turn to flesh? Ok, i am confusing myself now. Needless to say, she let me move in with her since she is 18 and Kal said it was ok to move in with her, on the condition that I keep a secret ID. That's right...shhhush about Linda. Oh great news though. Star learned how to look normal all the time now and she can finally um...meet guys without them worrying about being squashed I guess.

A very interesting Kryptonian I met was Jan El. She said that it was a mistake and her name was supposed to be Jannel, but now people think she is related to my cousin. Its kind of funny. I can never tell is she likes me or wants to punt me. She calls me a clone and when I try to explain to her I am not, she refers to Kara in the Watch Tower. I mean who made her the real Supergirl? I have had to save her a few times actually. Anyways, back to Jan. She looks a lot like a Kryptonian from I am not sure where actually. I think she is from the Phantom Zone. Maybe one of General Zod's army? All I know is she is really mean to me I think. The problem is a lot of times I like no idea at all what she is saying. I just know that Tara always snaps at her when she talks to me. She dresses in really low cut, talking like to below her belly button tops and boots. She is really sexy I guess, too bad not many people would want to get to know her unless they were crazy and liked to be punted....hehe. Jan is a friend of Ryder...the girl with a bow.

Speaking of Rider. She always shoots me with a bow or a gun or something when I see her. It doesn't hurt or anything, but seriously? Is that how you say hi to a girl in your league? Um...hello? But when Jonny went to trial she was there. She stood by his side and didn't leave until told to. I am not sure if she was protection or if she cared enough that he had a fair trial? I think in a pinch though both Jan and Ryder would protect me....I hope.

[filament fish]

I love it, it's so cute

[Supergirly]

(( Continuation of her story...it is not always happy. she lost her sister and is trying to come to terms with it. I wonder if anyone will ever try to find her?))

Why do we even bother? Don't they know that my past is their future? I wanted to believe that this time things would be different. I wanted to believe that this time I could make a difference. That this time I could save the ones I loved...

Kyrss is dead. Murdered over being a clone...murdered for wanting to feel anything. To be felt...to want to live again. By who? The Justice League. Under the pretense that my cousin sent the assassin.

Snoweyflake she called herself. More like the Snow Flake Assassin as far as I am concerned. I mean...Kyrss did nothing wrong and she was killed. I screamed for her to stop, for them to stop...but the fight continued. Kyrss disappeared and all I heard was the sound of her dying on the comms. Justice League...what justice was done?

Delia tried to calm me down. Spiderboy showed up. I should have known Spiderboy would have told the JL about the plan to save Kyrss. Why did I trust him? I am so studpid sometimes. I am an alien and I am starting to think that means I will never truly have what these people have on this planet....a home.

Spidey upset Delia that night. I went berserk and tore off my clothes. I destroyed my comms unit and flew off. I didn't care where/....I just flew. It didn't matter. I ended up at the ocean and I just dove in. the water hit me like a brick, but bricks shatter to my skin. I wanted to die...to stay there forever, but I am still afraid of water...pathetic huh? The Girl of Tomorrow I was called, the Princess of Power, The Maiden of Might...Supergirl...afraid of water, yeah...I am pathetic.

So now I live on the streets and just want to be left alone. I don't care if anyone ever finds me now. Supergirl can have all this crap. I am not even Kara...I am just The Alien now. Let the others try to be a hero. I know how this will end. Brainiac will win and we will lose. It is simple....who was I to think that I could save this world? My universe was destroyed. Brainiac is just waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike. I wish he would hurry up and get on with it. I miss you Mommy and Daddy...you little girl will be home soon. I am sorry I tried...I should have never been saved from the ship. Kal-El should have never rescued me.

I guess it is cold here...the wind blows and it doesn't bother me, but I am an alien so that is to expected. I have nowhere to go, no money to live in this world. Maybe I should fly to another planet or the moon? I have tried to sleep and some men bothered me. I left them broken and bleeding by a police station. someone will care enough to save them, for I don't...not anymore. Not after I realized I am only an alien and will never be one of them.

This box is not very comfortable, but I guess it is home now. I guess this is where I will be from now on. I think I am hungry but that can't be possible. I am an alien....I eat sunlight. I can smell someone eating a hotdog at a vendor...it smells great....no.....I am an alien.
More thugs...why do they bother? This time they tore my clothes. Did I doze off? Did I sleep? no...I am an alien...I need no sleep. Am I thirsty? I remember only a week ago I was sipping on a soda at the deli....I miss Kyrss. The Justice Girls were nice to me but....no....I am an alien. I am nothing like any of them. Am I a clone? no....I had parents but they are gone. I am an orphan...I have no one.

I am an Alien...

[White Paw]

"Pathetic. Ant I hat such high hopes. Obviously defektiv programink. She brinks the shame upon the haus of El. To think a girrl gifen that much power, huddlet in a box cryink the poor me's. She ist not the daughter of El I hat hoped for."--Jan El.

Tough love 'nough for ya? :P

Sexy? In-game? Ha! Frankly DCUO's so family-friendly I feel like I'm stuck in the 70's. Try "style: straightrazor" on for size sometime:



<cough> Y'all (including DC) have no idea.

Anyway, cute, believable story! 'course Jan catches ya sob storyin' around she might have'ta slap ya 'round a bit :P

TTFN!

[Supergirly]

Oh Rao...where do I start? I mean I was on the streets and I thought all was over and then Tara found me. She always knows what to say. So she took me to her special pocket dimension, I think, where she let me stay like a week and recover. I had to think about a lot of things while there and she made me face them all. I realized that it hurts a lot to lose someone, but you recover. I mean heck...really I have lost a universe and losing another here just adds to it. But Kyrss was special. She even told me that in the future I would help her return, yet how is that possible now? Anyways....I am back. Oh yes and I have taken up the full title as Supergirl again.

But that is not the big news. The big news of the day stems from something that Dione told me. Oh yeah...who is Dione, right? Well she is like this genius woman....seriously...I am not kidding. She had like 5 masters degrees in like all kinds of stuff when she was like 8 years old or something. So anyways I was kind of upset when this girl I met, named um...Sigma, yeah I know another girl that I have not talked about hmmm ok so like maybe I should keep up with people I meet right? Ok, well fine....FREEZE NOTES

Oh so like here it goes. New people I have met on the planet and updates on the ones I know. Yes, these are my own opinions so anyone that is snooping around in my journal, well...you are about to get in my head, yes...you were warned.

Taen....Taen...taen............Amy
She was Taen 615, but now she is Amy. She was like a Defender Class robot or something from another planet, but I think I already talked about her once, or maybe not? But anyways, we are like best friends now. Yes, Mary is still my BFF but lately I haven't seen her...I will tell you about her later, so just wait. Oh what like who am I talking to again? It is only me here and I am reminding myself to talk about me and um...wait. I am confusing myself again....whew....breathe Kara Zor-El....ok....ready...

So I have been talking to Amy more and learning more about myself in the process. She is funny sometimes how she tries so hard to do the right thing, kind of like me, but she was an AI at one time. I say was because she is so much more human than some humans I meet now. But there is one problem with her and it is not her, it is Jonny England. He is like my boyfriend and when I say he is jealous I mean he is totally jealous. I gave Amy a kiss once and he went ballistic on me. I tried to explain to him about tel rey shar nar, or Love and Light and he lost it.

Quick note about tel rey shar nar, for the Kryptonian illiterate, it is how one opens their heart and lets others in. Okay, so I don't know all about it but hey I was a kid when I left Argo and at that point my mother didn't really teach me all about it. But I also listened to the older kids talk about it like it was the best thing in the world. What it really means is that love is too small to hold more than one person. We all can love someone but it is limited. As I told Jonny once, love is a silly little word. People will cheat for it, they will steal for it, they will lie for it and they will even kill for it. In the end though love is not big enough and in the end it fails, it ends. But light is stronger than love. It pierces darkness and it shines bright. The most important part of light though is that when you open it up and really shine it, you allow others to find you. Kind of like a lighthouse I guess. At that point your love is open for all to see and to come to you, if they see your light then they were meant to find you. Light can bring more than one to you, but according to Jonny. Humans can only love one, unconditionally. Such a silly little word....LOVE.

So yeah, I explained, or tried to explain it to Jonny and he blew up. Ok, not really or literally, oh Rao....I just used a "not from Kansas" word. Am I finally becoming more human?

tel rey shar nar Jonny. He didn't get it no matter how many times I said it to him. All I was saying was Love and Light Jonny, and he ignored me. It wasn't until I was comepletely in tears (Sorry Jan....I know I am weak, so get over it...haha) theat he finally said tel rey sha na Kara...yeah I know he messed it up, but what do you expect from a guy that doens't really want to understnad the girl he claims he loves...right?

So anyways, me and Jonny had a big fight over it. We are still trying to work it out but I wonder if he will actually ever understand me? I mean is it fair for me to make him understand me when I don't understand him? He is from a royal family of England. I get that. I also get that his home was practically destroyed by Brainiac. I know all about destruction of homes...hello....my universe...anyone?

But still, he is sweet to me when we are not trying to kill each other, but he is so stubborn. So I kissed Amy. is that the end of the world? I was just trying to explain tel rey shar nar to him and he didn't let me even get that far. Oh well.